Adventures in Gardening: No-one here knows what they’re doing

There’s not a lot to see in my garden at present, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to show you anyway.

Here’s the main plot. As you can see, not a lot is going on in there:

A photo of my garden bed. Several areas have been marked out with the following labels: Snow Peas; Wombok!; (more Wombok); unclaimed wilderness; a lot of spring onions; garlic. There are tow unmarked plants in one corner

Very beautiful, as you can see. I am an expert gardener with many skills who knows what she’s doing (a.k.a. blatant lies.)

But what, I hear you ask, are those two mystery beauties up the back. Well, they’re eggplants. That I planted in September. Which refused to die over the ridiculous summer, but also haven’t got any bigger. I don’t know what’s up with them. I’m going to keep an eye on them just in case they are up to TREASON of some kind.

A photo of the two plants from the previous image. They've been labelled "stubborn eggplants." A note points to some white splotches on on the leaves and says "wot is this?"

(I think it was water? There’s nothing there now.)

These aren’t the only stubborn bastards holding on from my summer garden. I have the world’s smallest rosemary bush and some lemon thyme that never got big enough to actually put in anything and is now sadly curling up into a sad husk of its former self.

A Close up photo of some herbs sharing a pot: one rosemary and one (lemon) thyme. The text reads, "not featured: parsley; sage"

Somehow, I also have potatoes! I think. I planted potatoes in these bags, but they died off. And not in the ‘we died off so you can harvest us now’ kind of way, but the ‘you left us in the sun when it was 45 degrees C you heartless woman’ kind of way.

And now I have suspiciously potato-looking plants coming up, all healthy confidence. Look at that posture. I don’t know for sure, but I think there might be potatoes in those bags.

A photo of two plastic bags of the kind that you buy potatoes in, full of dirt with some green leaves growing out of it. The text reads, "possibly potatoes..."

Then there are the definitely-potatoes. I cut the sprouty ends off some potatoes and popped them into this shopping-bag-lined-bucket with a bit of dirt. I suspect I should have removed some of the debris from the dirt before I started, but this is anarchy, so there you go.

So that’s the garden! I’ll give you updates as we go, because obviously the reason you’re reading a romance writer’s blog is because of your deep love of gardening porn.

(If this is gardening porn, it’s the really dirty kind *ba-dum-tsh*!)

Robin Moray is a carbon based life-form from the planet earth, who likes reading, writing, and daydreaming about the day some awesome supernatural or extraterrestrial being invites her to run away with them. She will 100% go. (But she'll grab her handbag first, it's where she keeps all her stuff.)

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